Addiction is a Very Bad Thing

Design by Anne Taintor

One of the biggest steps for me was admitting that I have addictive behavior. That was not something that I truly admitted to myself until after I got the lap band. I've also learned that I can transfer my addictions from one thing to another and this is my next step to recovery.

The day before my lap band surgery the surgeon visited with me in the pre-op appointment. He asked me how I felt and he asked me how much weight I realistically hoped to lose. I told him eighty pounds. He told me that it was a good number. Then he said something that stayed with me since. He said, "Just remember, some people get the lap band here (pointing at stomach) but they don't get the lap band here. (pointing at head)"

I feel like I am still working on getting that lap band in my head.

At the beginning I went on the lap band discussion groups and I read so many horror stories and negative comments. I also read some good comments and I saw some amazing before and after pictures.

After a while I decided to stop reading these discussion groups because there were so many negative comments out there. I kind of wish I had kept reading them for incentive from the before and after pictures. But I resolved to just follow all the rules.

I've followed the main rules for the most part, but I am the first to admit that I haven't followed all of the rules. If I had I would have lost eighty pounds by now.

That's the part that's hard about the lap band. Some people get it and think that it will do all of the work. It doesn't. It does control the quantity that you eat. You will never overeat in one sitting again. But it doesn't control you from eating the rest of your food two hours later. It doesn't control you from taking in liquid calories or fat. It doesn't make you exercise.

The lap band is put in place to remind you that you shouldn't overeat or do any of those things. That's another thing I've learned. But does it stop the addiction? Especially my addiction to carbs? Honestly, no. That's something that I have to cure myself.